Just recently we have hit the busy teen-age stage with hormones flying, lack of enough sleep sometimes, lots of homework, piano lessons, Sports, Scouts, Youth Programs and grumpy moods for seemingly no reason and sometimes just plain disrespectful and unkind. My almost 14 yr. old has found he likes his independence and as he sees it--being the "boss" of himself. He no longer wants to abide by some of the basic rules that he's been living by for the almost 14 years he's been alive. So needless to say I've been at my wits end trying to get through to him. Nothing seemed to be working---gentle persuasion, pleading and when that didn't work, ranting, raving, nagging, demanding, etc. especially didn't help either. Something had to give--I wanted my sweet boy back again. After talking to my friend Britt in Arizona, she told me of a parenting class/books/program that has helped her family of six children. It's called "Love and Logic Parenting", http://www.loveandlogic.com/ . I have received my first 2 books that I ordered. One is for Teens and the other for challenging children with attention problems. I have almost finished the Parenting Challenging Children book and have found the theories to be very useful. Love them by showing you care and with empathy and providing logical consequences for their actions. It all sounds so easy in the book---and I thought I had been doing this already--so I had my doubts, but nevertheless, I began using the suggested power phrases and already the past 2 days noticed a difference --he hasn't been as defiant after receiving several consequences for his choices. He realized that I was no longer engaging in a power/control struggle with him and that he wasn't getting very far with me for what he wanted. He no longer has been able to push my buttons (this is only day 2 though--so I'm sure he'll get me soon!!). The goal of course is to teach our children to become responsible, successful adults that can think and problem solve for themselves and have confidence to know they can handle the situations that come their way.
So this is my new quest this week---reading these books (along with another one I'll talk about later---"Stop Whining and Start Living" by Dr. Laura) This does put a halt to finishing my next digital scrapbooking albums--that I enjoy working on so much, but I hope to have them posted in the next week or so.
Oh, the Joys of Parenthood---Why didn't they come with their personalized instruction manuals?
1 comment:
I hear ya. I am glad the books are helpful, I will definitely have to look into them for me and my sister who is raising her stepdaughter/teenager. Good luck!
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